resolve

i've never really done new year's resolutions before. the concept was something that seemed to only exist to me in socially neurotic tv shows or as jokes of self-assurance for people who were too afraid to take risks in even the most normal parts of their lives. i'm growing up and it terrifies me. reality is beginning to take over expectations and i for once want absolute consistency. i don't mean in the boring sense, but that sometimes consistency is all we need if its with what you care about. here's to a new year of some good ol'...continuity.

beefheart

today capitan beefheart died and a little part of me died with him. my mind is racing faster and faster as each minute passes to be lost forever. another late night, this one later than most, has at least given me the chance to give a brief goodnight to the moon and play some christmas songs just quiet enough to not wake anyone but myself. i can't sleep again and i feel more conflicted than ever. my mind seems to wander outside of its normal confines, intensifying what i can only describe as an eerie "out-of-body experience." it's ironic and darkly humorous the way things work sometimes. how feelings and emotions and the way we perceive things can change faster than our mind can even comprehend. we feel sadness and all of its potency often before we don't know why. and every now and then, bursts of happiness for no explicit reason. that's how i felt on the day that captain beefheart died. goodnight moon, and good luck to us all.

top ten favorite albums of the year

i didn't feel like studying for finals so i thought i might change things up a bit tonight by making a top ten favorite albums of 2010 list. i couldn't decide the order, but maybe i'll make rankings later. now let's hope radiohead will have album for me to put on my 2011 list.

disclaimer 1: these are my favorite albums of '10, not necessarily apart of what would be on a "best albums of 2010" list

disclaimer 2: i like indie hipster shit

disclaimer 3: i read pitchfork (but not a regular basis)

random question of the day: what ever happened to xanga?

top ten favorite albums of the year:

this is happening -- lcd soundsytem

arguably the best hipster dance album this year. i haven't heard a drop better than the one in "dance yrself clean" this year. never. give. up. the. dance. floor.

the age of adz -- sufjan stevens

for sufjan stevens fans, this album was undoubtedly a pretty extreme departure from the timeless banjo strumming, down to earth sound that we love so dearly. yet what hasn't changed is sufjan's ability to pull off whatever creative knack he's been in to. i'm a sucker for good electronic music.

everything in between -- no age

i haven't got a clue as to what the dissonant screeching sounds laced through the entire album are, but it mysteriously makes the record complete. these are the simple touches that makes no age one of those bands that are just damn good.

forgiveness rock record -- broken social scene

just more proof that a indiepopsupergroup can consistently put out good pop music. "texico bitches" is one of the catchiest bitches i've heard in a while.

the suburbs -- arcade fire

aside from the excessive "childhood" references/analogies, the suburbs is one of those albums that don't have one or two songs that stick out, but almost every song gets to you in some way. besides, the amount of times will butler uses the word "child", "children", "sons", "daughters", etc would probably make a nice drinking game.

contra -- vampire weekend

not as good as their self-titled album, but songs like "horchata" are just awfully pleasant to listen to on repeat.

odd blood -- yeasayer

this is some funky shit.

all day -- girl talk

even better than "feed the animals" in my opinion. the plethora of ludacris/rock classic mash-ups have only given me another reason why i can't miss their 2010-2011 tour (january @ the pageant). not to mention that this album was made a free download on gillis' website. more power to tha people.

my beautiful dark twisted fantasy -- kanye west

one word to describe this album: badass. i never gave up on kanye. i wasn't a huge fan of 808 and heartbreak but who cares? and kanye's personality? i love everything about it. he's hilarious. but who am i kidding, its about the music. this album is just so fucking sick. from the continuance of the MJ/king of pop references, to the fact that every song is an epic collab with great artists, to the 35 minute long runaway video...there just isn't any room to criticize from "dark fantasy" to "see me now".

go -- jonsi

if i were to rank these albums, this one would probably be number one. jonsi's icelandic and "hopelandic" lyrics on the sigur ros albums never deterred me from being a sigur ros fanatic, but now that he has solidified that he can write lyrics in english and still manage to be perfect in every way possible? i would let this dude sing me asleep every night (no homo). seeing jonsi perform his full set with a full backing band live only makes the album seem more alive. i'm having trouble listening to the album without getting intense flashbacks of the concert. this is one of those records that acted like a literal soundtrack to some of my best recent memories. s, i am not embarrassed to say (no homo) that to this day "tornado" has been the only song that has made me tear up at the computer.

where i end you begin

today i write from the keyboard that my fingers pouted about almost two years earlier. it's undoubtedly a bit odd and i am forced to reflect and ultimately reconcile with what has changed within the couple years of my seemingly insignificant high school life. but to be fair to the comfort zone of my conscience, i rather not divulge into such reflection at the moment. i'll use the eternal excuse of homework as an scape goat this time again.

i often get frustrated with the lack of cohesion that exists between the desirer and the desired. i don't want to be blinded by the intangible purpose of achieving something that would most assuredly mean nothing once attained and i think that's what scares me about any sort of commitment. i hoped prior to this post that it would not fall under the categories of bitch fest, but like all my other posts i find myself in a constant lack of static satisfaction. jealously is a funny thing.